The Coversation worth a thought

My neighbour's grand children had come down from USA for their summer vacations. Its been 3 years they had not visited there "nain-amma" (dadi ma)!

My aunt told me how the kids are not liking India one bit. All they wanted to do was stay home and play in the lil play area aunt has! (Well, my neighbour aunt runs a pre-school and so has a nice kiddie play area too.. )

I made friends with the lovely girls and we kinda got along.. Just a day before they were leaving back for states.. we happened to have a conversation that went this way:

Kid: Do u like India?

Me: Yes, I do.

Kid: What do u like abt it?

Me: Well, its a beautiful country with wonderful people and an amazing cultural heritage sweety!

Kid: May be.. But i do not like India/Hyderabad much.. Its so dirty and trashed everywhere. And its smells so bad too.

Me: No Darling! its not all that bad you know.. I agree the trash is all over the place.. but it aint that bad.. trust me..

Kid: I do not think so! Also, I have some old people knocking at the glass windows at every signal on the road.. Who are they? they are so dirty and carry a baby who is always sleeping in so much noiseee...Who are they ? And why are they that way?

Me: They are the under privileged sweetheart.. they are known as beggars! Its a very hard life they are living u know!

Kid: Okay! Why doesn't anyone do anything for these people.  You know, I have not seen even one beggar in US..

Me: I am sure there are.. But much lesser than in India dear. :)

Kid: Why doesn't someone do something abt the trash and the roads and all..

Like all the conversation i ever had with my dad on this topic.. i decided to answer the same to this lil kid..

Me: India is a very big country and a huge population.. getting things in order will take a while but it is in process!

Kid: How large is India?

Me: Its very large. almost 30 odd states and 7 UT ( the last i remember was 25 states and 7 UT.. now i have lost count!)

Kid: U knw USA has 52 states and yet not even one state looks half like Hyderabad and India in its Trash and smelliness....

Me:(speechless!)

Questions, Questions, & More Questions..

Lately, I have been observing a pattern. A weird pattern! A pattern of questions.. questions that now am started to get sick of! These questions are put not just to me but many of my girl pals who are around my age. Also, people asking these questions are not our family. But neighbors, accquitances, first time meetings friends, friends not including close ones, guys, old aunties...in short its just "OTHERS" for me..

So this is how a conversation on online chats or personal meetings turns out to be...

Others: Hi, Where r u?
Me:      Hey!, Hi... M out of country
Others: Oh! when r u back?
Me:      Not Sure
Others: Aur shaadi kabh kar rahi ho? ( so when are u getting married?)
Me:      Patha Nahi (i donno)
Others: Kyon? Ladka nahi dekha kya? ( Why? have u not seen a guy yet?)
Me:      Nahi (No)
Others: Accha! tou tumhara future ka kya plan hai? ( Okay! so what are your plans for the future)
Me:      Mein kuch plan nahi karti (I dont plan anything)
Others: Oh! gud.
Me:      yup!
Others: So.. tum shaadi India mein karogi ya bahar? (So.. will u get married in India or abroad?)
Me:      I donno.  Haven't thought about it.
Others: gud. But kya tumhe india accha nahi lagta?? ( Oh good.. but is it that u dont like india)
Me:     Aisa kuch nahi hai. Mein holiday pe hoon. (Ther's nothing like that.. M on a holiday ya.. )
Others: Ok. Shaadi pe bulaogi na... (ok. U will invite for ur wedding na?)
Me:      GTG. Will catch up later. :) Ciao...
Others: okay!

Sigh! I hope you got my point... "sulk" :)

The big "M". As if gurls grew up only to get themselves eligible for that big "M". Its not like i do not believe in the consitution of marriage or am against it. Its just that, everything has a time and for many the time may be not as per normal usual practices. Dear people, please give gurls their desired space and time. Especially when their families are there to do all the worrying for them.. :P

I am sure many gurls my age or elder have gone through these series of questions. At least i know of many. What's even more hilarious is the extent of wanting to know when is the wedding...despite trying to fool us by asking random trivial questions..which even we know is not the real question or intention..its all coming back to just that one question..

The best is being asked these annoying set of questions in the same set manner by guys our age.. WOW!

Its funny how the questions have not changed much over a period of time.

Some 7-8 yrs back, the questions asked were:

Others: Hi.. u busy?
Me:      Hi, No tell me...
Others: How r u?
Me:      M good. Hw r u?
Others: Hw's life?
Me:      Fine
Others: Which college? wht u studying?
Me:       XYZ college.. abc subjects
Others: oh cool! So what plans?
Me:      Thanks! nothing yet.
Others: Bfs?
Me:      No.
Others: Hw's it possible?
Me:      Is it important?
Others: Was just wondering hw can u not hv at-least 1..
Me:      OKAY!!!!... well, i gtg.. bye!

LOL... the questions almost remain the same....

so long... :)

Dear "Mr.Knowall" Creatures (M.E.N)- Its Never Too Late...

Human Beings are superior creatures! or if i may be excused.."the most evolved BEASTS"... :)

And what's even best is that, although we all belong to this exceptionally superior category..we discriminate amongst ourselves! Leave alone the world busy discriminating over caste, creed, sects.. bla bla bla.. we just cant stop discriminating between being MAN & WOMAN.. (& excuse me..we are not talking about reservations for women for education etc here...)

I am sure, its not new to any woman or girl down on earth to be treated like,.." what the heck, u don't know this much????", "women!the most confused lot", "women! a pain and reason for all the pain", or even when a guy is driving and the vehicle in front or by their side is that of a women's..u would have definitely said it at least once.."oops! stay far from that car..a lady is driving"...And if this was not enough humiliation, we have people speaking and writing and discussing.."how painful women/girls are".

Recently, i read a blog written by a friend of mine. Describing how useless and pointless it is to understand and even think about a women! No offence though.. But hello..All you "Mr. Knowalls"..Have you ever bothered to think what you'll do and how painful can you'll get? And top it all.. its you men who drool even at the slightest sight of a women! So stop blaming women for everything you see and find.

We women accept, understanding us is complicated.. cause we think with our hearts even before anything in this world. But you'll??? Are you'll even true to yourselves? Give it a thought.

Let me tell you, I am not being biased here. There have been instances when i myself have at least once said.." Oh! such a typical girl".. I accept it. I am pretty tom boyish. And while i can think with my heart. I can be as stubborn and practical as men assume themselves to be. But right now... its not about me.. Its about the arguments and annoying discussions over women and I am totally annoyed with the way Men just go on and on about themselves. Just because women do not say anything does not make them any less superior.  Leave alone that, I have known so many male friends and colleagues who are just as confused and rather even worse than that of women. And to this if my dear male friends want to counter me stating that its just 0.5% or 1%..Then i'd say.. Please dear men..u'l need to introspect.

If a women's understanding is considered to be her stupidity.. and her expressing herself is considered demanding and expensive.. I guess, u'l need to think over as to what do you want. If you'll have so much of a problem with women, y the heck on earth do u run after women. Y is such a status quo to have a her with you when u out for a party or even just by yourself. Y is it that u feel lonely and need her. y is it that u cant just respect her for who she is and accept her the way she is.. rather than customizing her for yourself. She is not an instrument or a toy that you play with her when u like and just dump her in your backyard once your bored.

Its funny, how men want the best and have life on their terms even if the choice they make are stupid! But in case she does the same.. we will have articles talking about " Smart women, not so smart choices". Ha! ha!

Nature is designed this way..  he cant be without her and she cant be with out him. Simple! Its just about nurturing, learning, maturing, and accommodating each other well. You cant always be demanding and customizing as if u were at the Dell online shop! Come to terms with life.. No one can understand his/her partner a 100%. M sure even our parents do not understand each other 100%. But having lived together, cared for each other.. You just begin to love, learn, and grow. Man is a social animal. He cant be alone.

So stop complaining about women. And please for heaven's sake.. if u want to be respected. Then earn it. And don't forget to respect her! she is well deserving of it.

And by the way, you have been made superior not because u are.. But cause we women let u. If women start to behave like u men do.. U shall regret!

Lets live cordially.. trusting, loving, and respecting each other for who we are.

Love Always!



Guilty!

Uncertainity....

"Necessity is the mother of invention."

Its something we'v known forever. But tell me what creates uncertainty? Isn't it the same necessity?
I am a bit puzzled and worried lately at the conversation i have had with people around me. Invariable, every conversation i have had with any person has shown a high degree of randomness/uncertainity.

In a way looking back, i cannot help but wonder how our conversations have changed with time. Even a random person i meet on the road speaks to me with the same degree of anxiety. Anxiety of studies, placements, proposals, post marriage stress, future securement....the list is endless.

We just dont seem to stop! Hold yourself. Please give yourself a moment. Take deep breathes and then think. But think sensibly. You cant eat all the onions in the world today just worrying whether you'll get onions later in life or will they be $100 a kg. Give it a break!

Okay! i know you would think i am being stupid in saying..live your present first before worrying about your future. But think about it! Not everything needs to have a mission and vision behind it. If you wanna go scream your guts out..do it! dont worry about how sour you throats gonna be later..its curable..;) Look at the brighter side to it..you feel happy!

Happy it should be always.............. " Smile, fly high, let the breeze caresses your skin...let it ignite your senses to just break free...and live every moment like its your first................."

Live life! you wont get a second chance!

Ciao,

Love,
Appu

Music... food for the soul.. ;)

The Power of Positive Talk

Read Through. I received a mail from my brother the other day describing the Power of "Positive Talk".

I am copying the same here.. Hope you learn and understand the Power of Positive Talk as much as i did. (I can relate to this article very well...Many a times when mom said, "keep an eye on the milk.Switch it off when it boils..." and 5 mins later she would say," don't forget the milk..else it'l spill..." Oops! n there i can see the milk spill all over the stove..  :P

Well, frankly every time Mom said.." Don't drop..." I for sure have dropped it.. :)

Read on..

The Power of Positive Talk

I remember my dad teaching me the power of language at a very young age. Not only did my dad understand that specific words affect our mental pictures, but he understood words are a powerful programming factor in lifelong success.

One particularly interesting event occurred when I was eight. As a kid, I was always climbing trees, poles, and literally hanging around upside down from the rafters of our lake house. So, it came to no surprise for my dad to find me at the top of a 30-foot tree swinging back and forth. My little eight-year-old brain didn't realize the tree could break or I could get hurt. I just thought it was fun to be up so high.

My older cousin, Tammy, was also in the same tree. She was hanging on the first big limb, about ten feet below me. Tammy's mother also noticed us at the exact time my dad did. About that time a huge gust of wind came over the tree. I could hear the leaves start to rattle and the tree begin to sway. I remember my dad's voice over the wind yell, "Bart, Hold on tightly." So I did. The next thing I know, I heard Tammy screaming at the top of her lungs, laying flat on the ground. She had fallen out of the tree.

I scampered down the tree to safety. My dad later told me why she fell and I did not. Apparently, when Tammy's mother felt the gust of wind, she yelled out, "Tammy, don't fall!" And Tammy did fall. My dad then explained to me that the mind has a very difficult time processing a negative image.

Observe what they do. Most people release their hands and watch the pencil hit the floor. You respond, "You weren't paying attention. I said TRY to drop the pencil.
Now please do it again." Most people then pick up the pencil and pretend to be in excruciating pain while their hand tries but fails to drop the pencil.

 
Toxic phrase: "You shouldn't watch so much television."
Likely result: Watches more television.
Better language: "I read too much television makes people slow.”
 

You might find yourself turning that TV off and picking up one of those books more often!

Examples:
Toxic phrase: "Don't drop the ball!"
Likely result: Drops the ball
Better language: "Catch the ball!"But:  Negates any words that are stated before it.
Try:  Presupposes failure.
If:    Presupposes that you may not.
Might:  It does nothing definite. It leaves options for your listener.
Would Have:  Past tense that draws attention to things that didn't actually happen.
Should Have:  Past tense that draws attention to things that didn't actually happen (and implies guilt.)
Could Have:  Past tense that draws attention to things that didn't actually happen but the person tries to take credit as if it did happen.
Can't/Don't:  These words force the listener to focus on exactly the opposite of what you want. This is a classic mistake that parents and coaches make without knowing the damage of this linguistic error.Here is a list of Toxic Vocabulary words. Notice when you or other people use them.If our parents can set a lifetime of programming with one wrong statement, imagine the kind of programming you are doing on a daily basis with your own internal dialogue. My dad also told me that psychologists claim it takes seventeen positive statements to offset one negative statement. I have no idea if it is true, but the logic holds true. It might take up to seventeen compliments to offset the emotional damage of one harsh criticism. These are concepts that are especially useful when raising children. Ask yourself how many compliments you give yourself daily versus how many criticisms. Heck, I know you are talking to yourself all day long. We all have internal voices that give us direction. So, are you giving yourself the 17:1 ratio or are you shortchanging yourself with toxic self-talk like, "I'm fat. Nobody will like me. I'll try this diet. I'm not good enough. I'm so stupid. I'm broke, etc. etc."You will never hear the words "I'll try" come out of my mouth unless I'm teaching this concept in a seminar. If you "try" and do something, your unconscious mind has permission not to succeed. If I truly can't make a decision I will tell the truth. "Sorry John. I'm not sure if I will be at your party or not. I've got an outstanding  ommitment. If that falls through, I will be here. Otherwise, I will not. Thanks for the invite." People respect honesty. So remove the word "try" from your vocabulary.The point is made. If you tell your brain you will "give it a try," you are actually telling your brain to fail. I have a "no try" rule in my house and with everyone I interact with. Either people will do it or they won't. Either they will be at the party or they won't. I'm brutal when people attempt to lie to me by using the word try. Do they think I don't know they are really telegraphing to the world they have no intention of doing it but they want me to give them brownie points for pretended effort?Ask them to hold a pen or pencil. Hand it to them. Now, follow my instructions carefully. Say to them, "Okay, try to drop the pencil."
 Naturally, I dropped the ball. My coaches were not skilled enough to teach us proper "self-talk." They just thought some kids could catch and others couldn't. I'll never make it pro, but I'm now a pretty good Sunday afternoon football player, because all my internal dialogue is positive and encourages me to win. I wish my dad had coached me playing football instead of just climbing trees. I might have had a longer football career. Here is a very easy demonstration to teach your kids and your friends the power of a toxic vocabulary.This concept is especially useful when you are attempting to break a habit or set a goal. You can't visualize not doing something. The only way to properly visualize not doing something is to actually find a word for what you want to do and visualize that. For example, when I was thirteen years old, I played for my junior high school football team. I tried so hard to be good, but I just couldn't get it together at that age. I remember hearing the words run through my head as I was running out for a pass, "Don't drop it!"In fact, people who rely on internal pictures cannot see a negative at all. In order for Tammy to process the command of not falling, her nine-year-old brain had to first imagine falling, then try to tell the brain not to do what it just imagined. Whereas, my eight-year-old brain instantly had an internal image of me hanging on tightly.

Love is in the Air........

Closest to my heart.. These are  My songs!!! ;)

Happy Valentines Day to one & all..May you have the best Valentine ever.. (every moment in your lives)

The Lady Next Door

Back then, in the 60's & 70's and a large part of the 80's believed in early weddings, especially if there was an eligible bride.. young & beautiful & charming. It was an era when every family possible had a minimum of 4-5 children and without exaggeration even more.

It is during this time, that I know of a lady, 18 years of age..young, dynamic,  humble, pretty, & charming...something that was believed was not part of the characteristic features of the girl but rather something that came with that age. She was THE eligible bride. The eldest and definitely the smartest among the siblings. The parents got her married off..One of their responsibilities was over and done with. In those days probably it was the best!

The Lady next door, as I would like to address, was indeed wonderful. Not sure if her life actually began at 18 or ended. But She was a fighter. In a family that was not one bit homely..all alone..she dreamt. She dreamt fearlessly and strived even more to get her dreams in her palms.

She hoped to be supported by the man she loved and cared for..But had no reasons why she expected so much from him so soon.. He was right in his place and she knew it..But she knew she was not wrong either. She started out and found her way to study. Her studies were the main ingredients to her dreams and aspirations. 

Taking care of kids, in-laws, family, extended family..She was just the ideal daughter-in-law from one of Ekta Kapoor's serials. The one who is the best but never respected and loved for who she was and what she did for the family..Probably in such circumstances..its invariably observed that kids are the only ones who understand, love, care, and support un-conditionally.Her's was a similar picture!

Time passed, and so did the years.. She made a fine teacher out of herself. Where she was just out of school.. she graduated and post graduated her-self with her dedication and passion. A fine teacher and mentor. 

Days passed and she was holding her dreams in her hands. She could feel them in her heart and soul. She felt blessed! She thanked the almighty as always for being there with her. She is never short of ideas and motivation. Its amazing and heart warming to see her work. Her passion.."TEACHING"..her love.. for "KIDS" is outstanding. Today, her dreams are in her lap. I have been privileged to know her so closely. She is "THE LADY NEXT DOOR".

Before she could take a sigh of relief and treasure the  happiness...she was encapsulated into a fight with herself.. I knew of the fight of the survival of fittest..but here i was seeing a fight to survive herself and the uncertainty that was accompanying her.

 

It hurts to see that lady in pain and distress today. She has been wonderful. I do not think she ever hurt an ant. But seeing her in pain is painful. Series of collapses, hurts, surgeries, aches, & pains. Reports do not speak as much as the uncertainty that lies within her. The series of hospital visits every second day, blood tests, scans...I hear the pain in her voice and it hurts me every time i hear her say," I do not know when i am going..". There are tears in her eyes.. I can see it. there's a shiver in her voice..i can sense it..but she pretends to be brave and strong..So long she fought her battle for her dreams..and now she fights a battle with uncertainty!

The other day she went for an MRI. I knew she was going but never knew how that scanner worked. I had read many a times..but just the technical aspects of it..Did not know how it feels to be in there. It was sheer co-incidence that while the lady was in that box, i was reading about the feelings of a Cancer patient going through an MRI (Eating Pomegranates by Sarah Gabriel) . I was scared! 

She is back from the hospital, but her fears are visible in her eyes. The questions are a float in her blood and in every breath she takes. She cannot get her mind to think anything beyond what is happening.. the questions are endless and the answers are blurred and many a times un-available! (The number you dialing is currently unavailable. Please leave a text or call again later.... Annoying!!! isn't it??? )

A self made woman is today standing near the tip of the cliff...wondering how is it going to turn out. Will she fall? Will she find a crystal pathway from the cliff to get to land? Will she bounce off it? She is clueless!

While speaking to her, i was wondering..this lady fought against all odds and became a self made woman. She loves and cares un-conditionally, she thinks for and about anyone except herself, as old as she is..she is still chirpy..What then is it that the/her almighty is expecting from her?

I feel an heaviness in my heart. I cannot write anymore. It hurts me when i hear her crying from within and smiling the american smile.. it hurts that a person who was self-less cannot ask or think of becoming selfish even at this moment. I hate to think how things work in the world. Their surely must be something super natural to all of this. When we work in a company( no matter which sector or vertical or anything), there is always a Boss..the one who decides, the one who is the brain child and approves of things.. I wonder who is the brain child for all this..

I once read an article that spoke of the wonders of life..a "Divine Design" [courtesy: The Speaking Tree, 1999]

When i was lil, my mother used to sew a great deal. I would sit at her knee and look up from the floor and ask what she was doing. She informed me that she was embroidering.

As from the underside I watched her work within the boundaries of the lil hoop that she held in her hand, I complained to her that it looked messy from where I sat.

She'd smiled at me, look down and gently say, " Son, you go about your playing and when i am finished with my embroidering, I will put you on my knee and let you see it from my side." I would wonder why she was using some dark threads along with the bright ones and why they seemed so jumbled from my view.

A few minutes would pass and then i would hear mother's voice say, "Son come sit on my knee". This I did only to be surprised and thrilled to see a beautiful flower or sunset. I could not believe it, because from underneath it looked messy.

Then mother would say to me, "My son, from underneath it did look messy and jumbled, but you did not realize that there was a plan on the top. It was a design. I was only following it. Now look at it from my side and you will see what I was doing."

Many time through the years, I have looked up to heaven and said, " Father what are you doing?" 

He has answered, " I am embroidering your life".

I say, " But it looks like such a mess to me. It seems so jumbled. The threads seem so dark. Why can't they all be bright?"

The father seems to tell me, " My child, you go about your business of doing my business, and one day I will bring you to heaven and put you on my knee and you will see the plan from my side."

I do not know what lies ahead for her. I do not know or can get my mind to understand a thing! But I hope the its going to be worth the wait. And as i always believed and continue to do so.." All's well that ends well"..( Not quiet sure what is it that is good in this saying for her..But i just hope and pray she get's dancing soon..)


Hat's off to the fighter! She for me is my LADY NEXT DOOR!

Kudos!

Love,
Appu


 

The Food Feista.......

Its a been a great week so far. And with 2 more days to go, i just could not resist myself from penning down the excitement. :)

Like i mentioned earlier..Cooking my way through mom's cook book has been exceptionally wonderful so far. I never quiet knew I had her genes drilled into me so well. Indeed! I ain't boasting or creating an imaginary world for myself and for you right now. Trust me! :)

This week's surely been a food fiesta at its best...

With no direction and only a spark of a thought..the food fiesta began..." a mixture of south Indian cuisines with English desserts ".. May sound weird to you..but trust me... U'l love it as much as i have loved preparing and eating them...

South Indian cuisines are amazing... Different flavors..what aromas... ummm!!! Incredible!

Steamed food has its own beauty...

To start with, what better start can the week have than starting from my native land.. "MANGALORE". 

Mangalore is popular  more for its food than probably anything else. The food has a distinct flavor.  Going down history, Manglorean food (as i understand and have read) is a  collective name given to the various cuisines of Tulu Nadu region. The community cuisines being that of Udipi (purely veg),  Mogaveeras, Billavas, Bunts, Saraswat Brahmins, Manglorean Catholics, & Bearys.

Among the communities that i mentioned above, I am well versed with the Saraswat Brahmin & Manglorean Catholic cusines (after all the 2 are an intricate part of me).

Manglorean food is known for the ingredients used. A large portion of the ingredients include coconut, rice, curry leaves, fish, ginger, garlic, and chilli. While these may be some of the ingredients used, i must say..considering the habitat ..which is largely coastal.. and densely supplied with coconut trees and paddy fields... the staple food invariably ends up being RICE, FISH, and COCONUT. (I guess, its totally the place that you live in that make us "human beings" to adapt to the surroundings..)

Being a Konkani, and having lived in every possible state in India..its amazing to discover and feel the culture and use the 5 sensory organs so well.. :P

Jokes apart.. getting back to the food fiesta..

Where Manglorean food was the highlight.. I did have a dash of Kerala & Tamil Nadu cuisines to bring some more variety. Adding a feather to my cap too :)

So here's a week dedicated to South Indian cuisines... 

Idli-Dosa-Sambar-Chutney (ground nut) [pic courtesy: google images]

Puttu (teamed with Ghee, sugar, & Banana) [pic courtesy: google images]

Manglorean Fish (Bangda/Mackerel) Curry, Appams, Sannas [pics courtesy: google images]

Sannas may appear to you as idlis..but it isn't. The moulds used are same and thus the look..but the sponginess and taste is beyond anyone's imagination... do try it some time! :)

Manglorean Fish fry ( teamed with Rice and Daali thoy)

Prawn fry   [pic courtesy: google images]

Phew! That's not it...

To add some variety.. decided lets have some fun around with desserts.. So...baked a raisin veg (egg less) cake..
[pic courtesy: google images]

and..the highlight for the week was the classic CARAMEL CUSTARD with grated orange (adding the required crunchiness and flavor to my pudding)..also known as Creme Caramel..
A lil brief i read about caramel custard which i could not resist myself from copy-pasting in here...


Baked custard! "Creme caramel. A light egg custard that is baked in a caramel-lined mould in a water bath. After the custard is baked, it is chilled and then turned out of the mold....In Spain, it is called flan and in Italy, crema caramella."
---The International Dictionary of Desserts, Pastries, and Confections, Carole Bloom [Hearst Books:New York] 1995 (p. 84) 

[pic courtesy: google images]

 

Aha! God bless Internet...and thank you all you wonderful people who have uploaded such wonderful pictures that I took your help instead of posting the pictures of the dishes i made.. (apparently, i do not click pictures of what i prepare....so ... :P)

Its amazing how I am discovering a new side to me.. The funny yet surprising part is that i never ever stood with my mom while she baked & cooked us these wonderful recipes, yet I am not letting her down for sure. I can vouch for it! (now that i am in her shoes...)

Love you mom... Muah! :*

So long...

Bon Apetite!!!

P.S: This blog is dedicated to my wonderful Mother for her love & patience & guidance & GENES...& & & & & ....(the list is long!!!!) In short... "I love You Ma" & i dedicate my food blog to you.. I hope u have loved the li'l cooking i have been doing... http://telangs-grubhub.blogspot.com

Old and unwell??? Get well super sooon....... :-|

Ex-Servicemen Contributory Health Scheme....aka "ECHS".. :)

A scheme that was developed keeping in mind the health of every army personnel after retirement.A medical cover. A noble thought indeed. My association with ECHS is due to dad...nothing more..Whenever i have fallen ill or needed to go to a hospital it has ended up being a private hospital after dad retired since i was never home. :)

Yesterday, after a long long time i went to ECHS with an aunt. Its funny how you can be treated at times. No offense..But what is with the made up accent and extra over the top love for a 14 year old boy who for sure heart of hearts must be wondering."what's wrong with this lady..why is she treating me like a kid..." :) Funny indeed...yet the love dint seem to disappear.. anyways..was just observing how it is when a kid walks in with his father to that place and what happens when he's all alone going to get treated.. when a retired doctor goes to get a referral written and when an ordinary man tries to ask for a referral.. Sincerely, no offense to the medical profession..but honestly..its not socially inclined anymore..its a corporate sector now. Works as per time and money.   

It was my turn, and i smiled at the lady who was doing the registration..Surprisingly,all the love 2 minutes before disappeared.. Not like i was looking 40 and evil... anyways..women are crazy and forever biased.. No offense!!! :P but its true..  Requested her for a referral and she denied..well.. i was a bit irritated..i cant seem to get along well with doctors despite the fact that my father and family is immersed and part of the same fraternity. As it is said.. "beggars are not the choosers" so..i gave in to what the lady had to tell.. Its not like its written on my forehead that i can bear free advice and talk all the time..yet..people have not yet given up on me.. Sometimes it just feels like i should just say.."hello, please cut the crap! I am not interested in what you have to tell me..I have things to do and can't spend all day listening to you... "  But unfortunately or fortunately as you want to call it..I can never ever say it to anyone.. ANYONE!!!!... anyways...so what next..we finally go in only to get to know the doctor we wish to see leaves at SHARP 12 o'clock.  What then.. knowing the ward boys and ladies is quiet a help at times.. managed to get our way to see the doctor.. (Honestly, we did not go to the doctor who the lady suggested us to go.. ha ha ha)

The doctor did not have even the slightest smile at the corner of his lips..he was grumpy...as if cursing us to have come at the nth hour and that to with out a referral.. our need..so cant have the same look as the doctor in return for the look he gave us..  Anyways...stuck around for quiet a while and got what we wanted..

The whole time i was at ECHS, all i observed was the behavior of the doctors towards the patients, the administrators of the place and the way they spoke of behaved. I wonder, when they must have retired they must have felt a heaviness, a withdrawal, a sudden depression..like life was ending..but then they got going..got a job as an ex-serviceman to serve the ex-servicemen..those who have done so much for the army/nation/people.. yet..why is it that people forget that the power and position they hold will die out someday..they will be in the same position as what these poor old army men are today...You keep them waiting for treatment ..someday you wont have anyone to even see you..May be you have been an exceptional doctor..but what's the point if you did not do your bit sincerely... What happened to the Hippocratic oath... are doctors not taking it anymore..or is it hypocrisy???

It horrible to be old..and even worse to be unwell.. and if you are an ex-servicemen..i guess its even worse.. 

Grow up people...GROW UP!!!!

Cooking my way through Ma's cook book...

Ola!

This year has started with a surprise. I am not quiet used to surprises, although I always wondered what it was to be pleasantly surprised! Finally, i too know what it feels to be getting surprises.. :)

As long as it was about surprises, i was living every moment..Till my happiness needed some rest.. well not in the bad way.. Just a bit of cold here and there..Now am up and about...back to life!

Lately, have been wondering how to pass/kill my time... I have 8 months of idle time in hand. There are loads of things i wanted to do all the time..but was wondering if i should get back to working or hold on and pursue my desires of various hobbies..haven't been able to come to a conclusion yet... :(

Anyway, i was cleaning up the house...when i found my mother's cook book.. "hand written" by herself. Mom's an amazing cook!

Well, this cook book is something mom wrote for me 3 years back and continues to add new recipes as she discovers new ones...Mom said she'd give me this book when i leave home... Hah! That'l have to wait..Nevertheless, i couldn't resist not going through the contents and details mentioned in it... Like i said..My mom's an amazing cook.. we never had the need or want or even requirement to go out and indulge ourselves..You think of any dish and ma would put on the table.. All we had to do was tell mom..." i feel like eating...XYZ..." Mom's a darling...All mom's are meant to be.. Hats off Mommy! Your a genius! Muah :*

Well, i am not much of a cook. I don't quiet venture out to cook on my own. I either need to be told to do so..or just any crisis and i don't mind cooking.. Although i am extremely fond of eating.. And frankly could cook the easy stuff that i love eating regularly.

Surprisingly, I have seen myself change over a couple of years.. I love inspirational movies..and cooking has become a hot favorite. :) Ratatouille, Julia & Julie, Chew, Master chef,etc.. I just cant seem to get over with any of these movies/serials..

The other day, i decided if not for anything i will at-least try to get cooking some decent food. I want to be as good as my mother if not better than her.. May be Half as good as her.. I think i can do it...So finally got cooking..and now am going to cook my way through my mom's cook book. In these 8 months, i am not sure as to what i will accomplish and what i will not. But definitely, i will try to spend every single day discovering something new about myself...Be it music, sports, cooking, dancing... I am gonna enjoy everything i do.. No sulking! No cribbing! Just pure discovering and living every moment to its fullest...

For starters, i have started looking out for a job..lets hope i get something worthwhile... The place i live in does not quiet have many openings in my area..but that's ok..its experiment mode..so i think i can move out of my set zone and find something different yet worth learning from..

Secondly, i finally got going in the kitchen and now am friends with it.. :)
From cooking pretty simple stuff to now moving on to making soups every day...i am loving it..love the fact that it tastes just like mom's..gives me the confidence to get better and moving ahead..

Today..was special for me.. special coz i baked a cake in mom's absence.. There have been several occasions when i have baked cakes...but they have been under mom's guidance and supervision.. today, i didn't just bake any cake..but i baked a Vegetarian cake/egg-less cake...n to my surprise...its edible and above all feels like mom baked it for me...

I am definitely enjoying this moment... am enjoying the fact that i can cook the way my mom does..just that i don't want to peep into the book all the time...want it to be on the tip of my fingers...Yeah! its pretty early for me to get there..but i sure will make it.. After all, i am my mother's girl... ;)

Till then.. Ciao...

Bon Apetite!!! :)

"What's in a Name?"- Shakespere

"What's in a Name?"
Well.. A lot of substance!
As a kid, i always wondered what my name meant. To the extent that i did ask my parents..All they ever told me was.."it just means a BEAUTIFUL girl". I somehow could not believe them. While in school and studying Hindi & Sanskrit i could never find my name under the beautiful category. I grew curious, when i spoke to my Hindi teacher. She told me that my name was the second name for Goddess Parvati. I liked the fact that my name was chosen with so much thought by my father.

When i got to know that my name was the second name for Parvati, i went back to my father and confronted him. All he told me was that APARNA symbolised strength and beauty to him.. He believed that my brother (AJAY) and my name means the same.. some one who cant be won over easily! Born to a Brahmin father, i now know the thought he put into before naming me APARNA.

Later, i met many Bengali people. Some of who are very good friends of mine. They told how beautiful a name APARNA is. They believe it symbolises the strength of goddess Durga.
It was in 1999 that my dearest friend told me that Aparna actually meant "leafless". I wondered why? It did not sound appealing to me. (it sounded like lifeless and weak to me).. It was then that my friend told me why Goddess Parvati was named Aparna. I was impressed and could not believe the little known story that she knew and told me. Thereafter, when anyone asked me what my name meant, i told them it was Goddess Parvati's second name and was called without leaf because of her determination.

Today, i do not quiet know what went through my mind.. But i randomly decided to do some googling.. ;) I typed my name and asked for its meaning.. and this is what i found. I always took pride in my name but did not quiet know whether i did justice to its meaning. Did/do i have even one bit quality of what my name actually refers to???? Can't tell for sure.. May be people who know me can say it best..But ask me and i would ";)"

Read on.. A beautiful story of Aparna.. (courtesy: www.boloji.com)
"The Name Aparna
Its Mythological Meaning in Hindu Religion
Compiled by Aparna Chatterjee

Goddess Parvati is also known by the name of Aparna. It means A (without) - Parna (leaf) – without a leaf. There goes an interesting story in Hindu Mythology as to how Parvati came to be known as ‘Aparna’ – the leafless one.

Himavan – The King of the snow-clad peaks of Himalayas and his wife Mena gave birth to a beautiful daughter, Uma, also known as Parvati, daughter of the mountains.

Parvati was Sati re-born, the mother-goddess herself, determined to make Shiva a householder once again.

After Sati had immolated herself in her father Daksha’s Palace, being humiliated before all the Gods by her very own father who denounced her husband Shiva as a wild, beastly, indecent vagabond - Shiva full of remorseful agony for his dead wife, isolated himself and led a reclusive life in the icy caves of the Himalayas in his abode – Mount Kailasa. He rejected the world outside.

Determined to draw Shiva out of his cave and make him her consort, every day, Parvati crossed the cold mountain valleys and went into his cave with gifts of fruits and flowers, hoping to win his love. She would sweep the floor and tend to the fire, so that he might take notice of her.

He never did. Not even once did he open his eyes to look upon her charming face. He either meditated or he smoked his pipe, the chillum, and lost himself in narcotic dreams. Parvati knew that she wanted Shiva for a husband. But how would she win his heart if he never looked her way?

Death of Kama

Parvati invoked Priti (the goddess of love and longing) and Rati (the mistress of erotica), to rouse Shiva out of his meditation. They entered Shiva’s desolate cave and transformed it into a pleasure garden of fragrant flowers, spring breezes, dancing nymphs, buzzing bees and singing mynahs. Kama – The God of Lust and Desire also joined in with his Consort – Rati, and with his sugarcane bow sent love-darts and arrows dripping with desire into Shiva’s heart.

Shiva was rather furious than amused. In his anger, he opened his third eye and with a flame of fury engulfed Kama’s beautiful body and reduced it to ashes. With desire so brutally crushed, the cosmic sage resumed his meditation.

“What have you done?” cried Rati, Kama’s beloved Consort. “Without desire, the bull will forsake the cow, the horse, the mare and the bees, the flowers. There will be no homes, no families, as men and women will not love each other. Society will collapse and life will be devoid of its very essence. Desire may be the cause of suffering; but it is also the reason for joy. What is life without it? An existence without flavor.”

Rati’s lamentations moved Shiva. He saw the wisdom in her words. He realized that complete rejection of the world made little sense. Living had its price - suffering; it also had its reward – joy. One came with the other. Together they gave a reason for surviving.

The death of Kama alarmed the Gods: “Without the Lord of Desire, man will not embrace woman and life will cease to be.”

Parvati said: “I shall find another way to win Shiva’s heart. When Shiva becomes my consort, Kama will be re-born.

Parvati’s Penance
Parvati realized that she had to prove the earnestness of her feelings if she wished to be Shiva’s Consort. Perhaps he would marry the mountain princess, if her love for him was true. With her he would find the balance between Yoga and Bhoga.

She went into the forest and performed rigorous Tapas, wearing nothing to protect her tender body from the harsh weather, eating nothing, not even a leaf, earning the admiration of the forest ascetics, Sadhus and Sages, who named her Aparna – the leafless one.

Parvati focused her mind on Shiva. She thought of nothing but him. She ate nothing, drank nothing, she only chanted his name. She sat so still that ants began to crawl on her skin and lizards slithered over her limbs, taking her to be a rock. The Sages were impressed by the determination of the mountain princess to endure such an endless fast for so long a time. They gathered around her and blessed her. “She is Aparna, the girl who refuses to eat even a leaf,” they said.

Aparna matched Shiva in her capacity to cut herself from the world and completely master her physical needs. The power of her Tapas shook Shiva out of his meditation. Her persistence was amazing. Shiva was impressed. He stepped out of his cave and accepted Parvati as his wife. He married her in the presence of the Gods with sacred rites before the holy fire. The cosmos rejoiced.
Parvati melted Shiva’s stern heart with her affection. Together they played dice on Mount Kailasa and sported on the banks of Lake Mansarovar, discovering the joys of married life. The Goddess also awakened Shiva’s concern for the world by questioning him on various issues about nature, society, life and marriage. As he spoke, he revealed the secrets of the Tantras, the mysteries of the Vedas and the splendors of the Shastras that he had gathered in eons of meditation. Thus his great wisdom was revealed for the good of the cosmos. Parvati was the perfect student, Shiva the perfect teacher. The world was enriched by these sacred discourses. Inspired by Parvati’s beauty, Shiva became the fountain-head of music, dance and drama. He sang and danced to the delight of the Gods who were pleased to see his enchantment with the Goddess. He came to be known as Lord of the Arts – Kaleshvar.

The Cosmic Couple
Parvati and Shiva complemented each other perfectly. She was gentle and graceful; he was wild and forceful. She domesticated Shiva and turned him into a householder, much to the satisfaction of the Gods. She softened the stern hermit with sweet words; her smile stirred love in his austere heart. When she embraced Shiva and the two became one in a sacred union, Kama – the Lord of Desire – the catalyst of all creative forces – was re-born. The twang of the Love-God’s Bow and the fragrance of spring filled the air. The cosmos and the Gods cheered this divine union. "


Thus, Aparna brought back the balance to the world!
And Guess what? My zodiac sign is " The Scales" ;)

It feels good to know the meaning & story behind my name.. I think its Apt for me (Libran Aparna -complete balance ;) )
"I love you daddy! you named me with one of the most beautiful names" Hurray!!!! :P

Love,
Aparna :)

2011

Happy New Year Folks!
2011!!
I am hoping and looking forward to something new and different that can change my life in a good way, be it personal or professional.

Off late i have been wondering, "have the decisions i have taken so far been correct? did i really want to do all those things that i did and ventured out to do? ". Frankly, i cant seem to remember whether i made calculative decisions or process thoughts. Though all that has happened did happen for the good.. As its always said.."Everything happens for the good".

Its a new year, and i am anxiously looking forward to this year. I am nervous, tensed, worried, & stressed..Not sure what's in store for me.. but like anyone else..i did work towards a few things. Waiting for the results now!!! Gathering myself together..trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together..lets see what i find out. Gosh! I have never seen myself this way.. so perturbed..so stressed.. its not me..but guess its the time... so..

Hey dear 20+C+N+B+11..i look forward to u.. :)